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Two and a Half Men: Season 3

Poster for Two and a Half Men Season 3

24 episodes · premiered Sep 19, 2005

Family ties tighten and tension rises as Charlie's wild ways clash with Alan's neuroses, leading to hilarious misadventures in love, work, and parenting.

Two and a Half Men: cast and where to watch

  1. Episode 1: Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts Sep 19, 2005 · 22m After falling off the roof, Alan needs Charlie's help in looking after Jake, which interferes with Charlie's social life.
  2. Episode 2: Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover Sep 26, 2005 · 22m Jake gets suspended from school after drawing an offensive picture of a girl in his class that has large breasts. Meanwhile, Charlie is asked to watch over Alan's chiropractic office after…
  3. Episode 3: Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark Oct 3, 2005 · 22m Alan has been dating a lot, and Charlie soon finds out that it has been one woman - his ex-wife, Judith. He tries to stop Alan, and even brings Rose, Evelyn and Berta to interfere - but…
  4. Episode 4: Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs Oct 10, 2005 · 22m Berta causes tension between Charlie and Alan, when she temporarily moves in with them
  5. Episode 5: We Called It Mr. Pinky Oct 17, 2005 · 21m Charlie learns he can't be in a long-lasting relationship, becuase of unresolved issues he has with his mother. Jake asks Charlie for advice about a girl at school.
  6. Episode 6: Hi, Mr. Horned One Oct 24, 2005 · 21m Ignoring Alan's warnings, Charlie continues to date Isabella until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.
  7. Episode 7: Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop Nov 7, 2005 · 22m Charlie wakes up with Rose the morning after her birthday party. Her irate father comes to ask Charlie about what the future holds for him and Rose, but the unexpected happens when Evelyn…
  8. Episode 8: That Voodoo That I Do Do Nov 14, 2005 · 21m Charlie tricks Jake into taking ballet lessons, so he can get close to the teacher.
  9. Episode 9: Madame and Her Special Friend Nov 21, 2005 · 21m One of Charlie's elderly neighbors tries to seduce Alan, while Charlie tries to stop Jake from giving money to a televangelist.
  10. Episode 10: Something Salted and Twisted Nov 28, 2005 · 22m Charlie helps Alan with his obsession of always having to get approval from the women in his life.
  11. Episode 11: Santa's Village of the Damned Dec 19, 2005 · 22m Alan starts dating a woman with a Martha Stewart complex. Before long she's running the house with an obsession for perfection.
  12. Episode 12: That Special Tug Jan 9, 2006 · 22m Charlie sees a therapist to learn how to deal with Alan's emotional insecurities.
  13. Episode 13: Humiliation Is a Visual Medium Jan 23, 2006 · 22m Charlie finds himself in a relationship that is not based on sex.
  14. Episode 14: Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded Feb 6, 2006 · 22m Charlie arranges a romantic date with Mia in the hopes of consummating their relationship. Alan begins to date Charlie's most recent ex-girlfriend.
  15. Episode 15: My Tongue Is Meat Feb 27, 2006 · 22m Charlie has trouble keeping up with Mia's healthy lifestyle, so he begins to sneak beers, cigars, and burgers behind her back. When Mia finds out what he was doing, Charlie has to decide…
  16. Episode 16: Ergo, the Booty Call Mar 6, 2006 · 22m Alan has trouble deciding if he should bring his younger girlfriend to Jake's birthday party to meet his mom and his ex-wife. Rose tries to get her boyfriend to act more like Charlie.
  17. Episode 17: The Unfortunate Little Schnauzer Mar 13, 2006 · 21m Charlie is nominated for an advertising award, but he decides to boycott it because his arch nemesis always wins. The rest of his family tries to trick him into going. Rose is having…
  18. Episode 18: The Spit-Covered Cobbler Mar 20, 2006 · 21m Alan starts to have financial problems when he starts paying for his girlfriend's bills, so Charlie tries to get him to break up with her. Meanwhile, Judith is after Alan because he is…
  19. Episode 19: Golly Moses, She's a Muffin Apr 10, 2006 · 22m Charlie is surprised to find out that Kandi has been living with them for the last three weeks. Alan is having a tough time helping Kandi earn a living. Charlie has lost his sense because…
  20. Episode 20: Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro Apr 24, 2006 · 21m Alan tries to win Kandi back. Meanwhile, Charlie starts to sleep with her mom, Mandi, and Judith gets set up with her father, Andy.
  21. Episode 21: And the Plot Moistens May 1, 2006 · 21m Jake's teacher has a meeting with Alan and Judith to discuss the lack of interest Jake has at school. Alan starts to fall for Francine, in a platonic way, because he is tired of the lack…
  22. Episode 22: Just Once with Aunt Sophie May 8, 2006 · 22m A girl from Jake's school invites him to his first boy-girl party. Charlie and Alan help him get ready for it by giving him advice. Alan and Charlie get nostalgic and remember their first…
  23. Episode 23: Arguments for the Quickie May 15, 2006 · 22m Mia comes back to town with her dance troupe and invites Charlie to her performance. At first, he decides not to go and tries to convince Alan that he no longer has feelings for her. He…
  24. Episode 24: That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite May 22, 2006 · 21m Charlie and Mia start making their wedding arrangements. Things begin to fall apart when their two families meet each other. They eventually decide on a small ceremony in Las Vegas.